Topics and Talking Points for Post Adoption Support

Looking for resources for your birth mom support group or retreat?

Here are some helpful topics that we’ve pulled together from birth moms we know. In addition to topics, we’ve paired some specific BraveLove videos and stories that could supplement your conversations around these real life questions and issues.

Disclaimer: BraveLove does not facilitate support groups or retreats for birth moms. This is NOT intended to be curriculum for a group, but rather additional tools and conversation topics that have helped cultivate healthy post-placement experiences.


Life Topics:

Mother's Day

Watch: A Mother Like You
Watch: Conversations on Open Adoption, Alison & Sherri, Part 1
Read: Mother’s Day for a Birth Mom

Telling your story 

Watch: Questions to Ask Yourself Before Sharing Your Story
Watch: "Your Story Helped Me In My Decision"

Birthdays

Read: Celebrating Birthdays

Dating after Placement - is this guy worthy to be in my child's life?

Read: Dating as a Birth Mom
Read: When to Drop the "I'm a Birth Mom" Bomb When Dating

How to connect when there is little to zero contact

Read: I Wish I'd Known Then What I Know Now
Read: Navigating the Emotions of Reconnecting

Managing the crowd: Dealing with your family's and friend's responses to your placement

Watch: Conversations on Open Adoption, Alison & Sherri, Part 1

Keeping your child at the center of your adoption relationship with the adoptive parents

Watch: Conversations on Open Adoption, Brindan & Jen, Part 1


Emotional Topics:

Community

Read: Birth Mom Connections

"Anytime I am entrusted with a birth mom’s story, when I hear her say, 'I’m a birth mom too,' I feel like I’m instantly, deeply connected to her. As if our stories are cut from the same cloth, I can listen and be heard without effort. There is no need for her to explain all the details or tell the full story. I don’t need to be told about the sheering pain or the spikes of joy. I know she loves and loses over and over again because of her choice. I know there are those that don’t understand and those that do. I am familiar with the inconsiderate questions and the unacknowledged status as a mother." - Michelle

Grief and Loss

Read: A Brief Look at Joy & Grief in Adoption

"There is no moment in life that I can think of where joy and grief are more present (in an all-out battle, if you will) than during an adoption. Adoption is born out of loss. Joy out of pain. Continued joy out of continued pain. The gift that keeps on giving." - Michelle

Identity

Watch: No Shame
Read: Not My Identity

"Being a birth mom is a very significant role in my life, but it is not all there is to me. My life didn't start the day I chose adoption for my son, and it didn't end the day he was placed in his parents' arms and went home with them." - Kaedra

Expectations

Read: Expectations in Adoption

"When it comes to adoption stories, we want to foresee the outcome, but the reality is, there is no way to know fully how they will actually turn out." - Abby

Perspective

Read: Janelle Asks, "What's his Label?" 


Other Favorite Videos:

Stephanie's Journey

"It was 15 years before I met another birth mom"

(un)Wanted


If you are interested in a birth mom speaking to your group, we know birth moms who are willing.  Just ask by contacting us here.