I remember being where you're at. I remember the shock, guilt, confusion, anger and the surreal feeling of having no control. I've been the girl sitting on the bed crying looking over 8 positive pregnancy tests, thinking if you take one more maybe it won't be true. Because I've been there and I've felt those feelings, I want to say a few words to you. And I ask you to keep an open mind as I tell you the truth. And the truth is, it’s hard. Every single part of it, finding out and making decisions you weren't ready to make is hard. The judgement, facing family, telling people, your body changing for the world to see, it’s all hard. 

Dear Birth Moms,

Just last month, we celebrated World Adoption Day. Maybe you knew that. Maybe you were totally unaware.

I don’t know if you checked your social media accounts that day. You may remember scrolling through selfies of parents and children who shared the story of adoption or if you were oblivious to it all.

Last month was National Adoption Month and I was finally given the courage to share my story.

I will never forget the day when I decided to place my child in the hands of someone else. I thought giving birth was hard, I thought going into the army was hard, but placing a child for adoption has got to be the hardest thing I have ever done in my life. There were so many thoughts going through my head when I searched through the profiles for a family to care for my baby girl. Many people will never understand how I could place her for adoption and that's ok because this was my journey and this is my testimony.

All I ask is that you read it and share if you like...

If you ask me about myself; I will tell you I am a wife, and a mama to 4 kiddos, I will say that I love Jesus and journaling, and making reclaimed wood art.

At some point, I will probably mention my affinity for Dunkin Donuts and Harry Potter; and most likely I will tell you that I'm a birth mom, too. These are a few parts within the story of who I am.   

Meet Kaedra! Our next Being A Birth Mom contributor...

I placed my son for adoption 14 years ago, in 2002. I was 19, and I knew that was the very best thing I could do for him at that time in my life. I love keeping in touch with him and his family through open adoption.

“I loved him enough to give him life. But I had to love him, even more, to give him a life.” That is the response I give when I am asked how I could give up my child.

As a 17-year-old who thought I knew what it meant to be in love, I was oblivious to what it could mean to be careless. I remember where and when I got pregnant. While the doctor told me I wasn’t, I still couldn’t shake the morning sickness. Then my life turned upside-down.

As humans we’re accustomed to having expectations. We expect drivers to stay in their lane. We expect stores to stay open until they say they are going to.

We like to plan…to not feel surprised. Unfortunately things don’t always go according to how we anticipate. How do we deal with these things? How do we deal with the consequences that come with situations not turning out the way we predicted? When it comes to adoption stories, we want to foresee the outcome, but the reality is, there is no way to know fully how they will actually turn out.