Life After Placement
Myth: Adoption is one moment in time, then life goes back to being normal.
Reality: Placement marks an important moment, but it is not the end of the story. Adoption is a lifelong experience that can touch relationships, emotions, identity, and family life through every season that follows.
At BraveLove, we understand personally how adoption is interwoven into a birth mother’s life for years to come. Different seasons can bring about new challenges and questions that can be unique to a birth mom. We hope these resources will help you know that you aren’t alone as you navigate through stages and milestones of your journey. May the stories of birth mothers a few steps ahead in their journey be a guide.
Birthdays
Read: Celebrating Birthdays
Dating after Placement: Is this guy worthy to be in my child's life?
Read: Dating as a Birth Mom Read: When to Drop the "I'm a Birth Mom" Bomb When Dating
How to connect when there is little to zero contact
Read: I Wish I'd Known Then What I Know Now Read: Navigating the Emotions of Reconnecting
Emotional Topics
Community
- Read:
- Birth Mom Connections
"Anytime I am entrusted with a birth mom’s story, when I hear her say, 'I’m a birth mom too,' I feel like I’m instantly, deeply connected to her. As if our stories are cut from the same cloth, I can listen and be heard without effort. There is no need for her to explain all the details or tell the full story. I don’t need to be told about the sheering pain or the spikes of joy. I know she loves and loses over and over again because of her choice. I know there are those that don’t understand and those that do. I am familiar with the inconsiderate questions and the unacknowledged status as a mother." - Michelle
Grief and Loss
"There is no moment in life that I can think of where joy and grief are more present (in an all-out battle, if you will) than during an adoption. Adoption is born out of loss. Joy out of pain. Continued joy out of continued pain. The gift that keeps on giving." - Michelle
Identity
- Watch:
- No Shame
- Read:
- Not My Identity
"Being a birth mom is a very significant role in my life, but it is not all there is to me. My life didn't start the day I chose adoption for my son, and it didn't end the day he was placed in his parents' arms and went home with them." - Kaedra
Expectations
- Read:
- Expectations in Adoption
"When it comes to adoption stories, we want to foresee the outcome, but the reality is, there is no way to know fully how they will actually turn out." - Abby