Blog: news, updates & events

Birth Mom Connections

priscilla-du-preez-234138.jpgI talk about being a birth mom a lot. It’s something I am passionate about because I long to see human dignity stretch into adoption from all sides of the triad.

I believe deeply in the inherent value of people. So, talking about adoption and my experience as a birth mom comes naturally, and sometimes I assume I am the only birth mom in the room. Most of the time I am.

A Letter to a Younger Me

florian-klauer-489.jpgThis letter is intended to reach birth-mothers who don’t quite understand their emotions yet of a new placement or even an old one.

I hope it reaches someone who needs to hear that they’re not alone in these times; I know I would have welcomed a “letter” from someone who has been able to sort through and know these similar feelings of the turbulent waters of becoming a birth-parent.

Meet Allie

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Meet Allie! She's one of our newest contributors to the Being A Birth Mom column...

Hey there, I'm Allie!  I am a birth mother, wife, daughter, blogger, manager and dog mom. My favorite nickname I have is "Mama Allie" which was given to me by the most precious little boy I've ever laid eyes on. I placed my son 6 years ago as of December 2017. I am a manager and artist for a pottery studio in West Texas. I am a wife to the sweetest and most understanding husband who loves my birth son like he was his own. We have two sweet fur children, Murphy our Boston Terrier and Max our Boxer mix, along with our slew of backyard chickens.

Simple ways you can make a big impact!

Untitled_design.jpgChanging the way the world views adoption will take all of us. Whether you have a personal connection to adoption or not, you are needed. 

Here are 5 different ways to make a really big impact right where you are: 

Book Review

It's Book Club time! This month BraveLove's founder Ellen reviewed the book, and here's what she thought about it...

The Waiting: The True Story of a Lost Child, a Lifetime of Longing, and a Miracle for a Mother Who Never Gave Up by Cathy LaGrow

Reviewed by Ellen Porter

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(Warning: Spoiler ahead...)

The book The Waiting took me on quite an unexpected journey. It is the story of Minka, a 16-year-old child of immigrants who is assaulted in the woods by a stranger while attending a picnic in 1928.  She becomes pregnant and is encouraged to place her child for adoption. 

Book Review

Time for Book Club! This month our friend Rachel from Utah reviewed the book. Here's what she thought about the memoir... 

You Carried Me: A Daughter's Memoir by Melissa Ohden

Reviewed by Rachel Holdaway

You Carried Me

“This is the story of how I died.” This opening line from Disney’s Tangled could appropriately be the opening line of Melissa Ohden’s autobiography You Carried Me. The book follows Melissa’s relentless and courageous search for her biological parents and the truth surrounding her birth - and the failed abortion that was intended to take her life. 

What I Wish That I Knew Then That I Know Today

What I wish

As I am writing this, it is exactly 3 days after from Mother’s Day and a day away from my daughter’s birthday. Talk about a birth mother “double whammy”?! 

This is my second time sharing with BraveLove, and I appreciate their love for birth mothers and birth parents. Corinne will be turning 4 years old this year. While it feels as if time has flown by, it also feels like there has been enough time to grieve and grow. As many birth parents know, the grief comes in waves. It can hit us even when we are most satisfied and fulfilled in our roles as birth mothers (and birth parents).

Meet Chelsea

chelsea.jpgMeet Chelsea (again)! She's our next Being a Birth Mom contributor... 

Hello there! My name is Chelsea. I am a proud birth mother, having placed my daughter Corinne for adoption 4 years ago. I am the domestic adoption coordinator for Journeys of the Heart Adoption Services, near Portland, OR. Besides these titles, I am a sister, daughter, cat mom, fisher women, gardener, blogger and avid lover of the outdoors and the Northwest. I am a Texas girl at heart!

A Gift Idea For Mother's Day!

onehope_(1).pngThis Mother's Day, we have the perfect place to shop for the amazing moms, birth moms, sisters, grandmothers, and aunts in your life. Our friends at ONEHOPE Wine are showing their support for birth moms and adoption this Mother's Day by giving back to BraveLove. Here's how...

Book Review - To Have and Not To Hold

It's Book Club time! 

To Have and Not to Hold: The Bonding of Two Mothers through Adoption by Lorri Antosz Benson

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Reviewed by Laura from BraveLove

The title caught my attention, and then Phil Donahue's foreword motivated me to keep turning the pages of Lorri Antosz Benson's memoir To Have and Not to Hold.

When to Drop the 'I'm A Birth Mom Bomb' When Dating

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Let’s just be real for a second…”Birth Mom” is not exactly a box that someone would eagerly check when creating their dating profile. Because being a birth mom is not a regular trait that you would find in a lot of women, it’s hard to believe that it would be high on any man’s “must-have” list when choosing a mate.

When considering the idea that adoption and being a birth mom can be uncharted or possibly uncomfortable territory for some people, how do we navigate dating and gently drop the Birth-Mom-Bomb on the men in our lives who choose to pursue us?

Adoption Vocabulary

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The more time I spend reaching out to others about the truth in adoption, I find the skewed words and ideas many individuals have on the placement of a child, from a mother and father that love him/her so dearly. 

I encounter comments, and vocabulary that cuts deep into the being of who I really am as a birth mom. These statements that people throw around pertaining to adoption is crippling to my heart and to the hearts of many others. As with any sensitive topic, I think it is important to understand the truth behind the words we are spitting out of our mouths.

Meet Jessica

Jessica_photo.jpgJessica is an amazing woman with a whole lot of wisdom to share. She's our next contributor to Being A Birth Mom. Meet Jessica... 

Hi There! My name is Jessica; I am a wife, friend, Realtor, sister, blogger and birth mother. While these labels don’t perfectly define who I am, I do wear them oh so humbly! Being a birth mother has been one of my greatest and most favorite “labels” to take on.  

I made an open adoption plan for my son in 2009. Making this choice lead me to some of the brightest and some of the darkest phases of my life.

Celebrating Birthdays

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Hey friends! I write to you with such joy in my heart. This week I have several friends with children having birthdays. It’s such a joy to celebrate life! And it got me thinking…how do you celebrate your child’s life?

My amazing, loving husband and my children have a bit of a tradition for my son’s birthday. We get a sweet treat, put a candle in it (each of us have one), and we each say a silent prayer or wish for him. Then, we sing Happy Birthday to him and blow out “his” candles. I did it on my own at first, but now that my family is getting old enough to understand more of who this child is, my son and their half-brother, I get to share this with them. It is great to let them ask questions and celebrate him too. I love that my daughter made him a birthday card this year!

Lion: Now playing - plus 3 things we loved about the film

Lion, which is based on a true story, is simultaneously heart-warming and heart-wrenching. Five-year-old Saroo gets lost on a train which takes him thousands of kilometers across India, away from home and family. Saroo must learn to survive alone before being adopted by an Australian couple. Twenty-five years later, he begins to search for his family back in India with the help of Google Earth technology and his memory. 

Shop For a Cause with Stella & Dot!

There's a Stella & Dot online trunk show benefitting BraveLove. 

Get a jump on your Christmas shopping today! Shop online here and tell others about it too.

Being a birth mom is part of my story - not my whole identity

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If you ask me about myself; I will tell you I am a wife, and a mama to 4 kiddos, I will say that I love Jesus and journaling, and making reclaimed wood art.

At some point, I will probably mention my affinity for Dunkin Donuts and Harry Potter; and most likely I will tell you that I'm a birth mom, too. These are a few parts within the story of who I am.   

Meet Kaedra

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Meet Kaedra! Our next Being A Birth Mom contributor...

I placed my son for adoption 14 years ago, in 2002. I was 19, and I knew that was the very best thing I could do for him at that time in my life. I love keeping in touch with him and his family through open adoption.

Expectations in Adoption

photo-1467514643154-8db60228bb00.jpgAs humans we’re accustomed to having expectations. We expect drivers to stay in their lane. We expect stores to stay open until they say they are going to.

We like to plan…to not feel surprised. Unfortunately things don’t always go according to how we anticipate. How do we deal with these things? How do we deal with the consequences that come with situations not turning out the way we predicted? When it comes to adoption stories, we want to foresee the outcome, but the reality is, there is no way to know fully how they will actually turn out.

Meet Abby

Screen_Shot_2016-08-01_at_1.58.34_PM.pngMeet Abby - our next contributor to Being a Birth Mom! We met Abby this summer at a conference in Dallas, TX.

After meeting Abby, there are two things we know for sure - she is a proud birth mom and loves her son with all of her heart! Abby's smile is contagious and she's got some invaluable insight to share. Without further ado, here’s Abby...

Still Saying "Still"

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I’ve been thinking a lot lately about how I respond to people when they find out that I’m a birth mother. It’s interesting to think about my natural response because it tells me a lot about myself.

birth PARENTING

Birth_Parenting.jpegThe idea of birth parent seems so weird sometimes. It can make me feel like an alien species that none of the “normal” population can understand.

I just have to say this out loud....

What I Know Now That I Wish I Knew Then

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You can't read an adoption story without a then and now. The world sees an event where the adoption community knows evolution.

My journey is seventeen years long and counting. Seventeen years was a long time ago. Much has happened. Much. But what happened seventeen years ago has rippled through my life, even into this post that you are reading...

Meet Michelle

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BraveLove is excited to announce the start of something NEW!

We are launching a birth mom editorial column called Being a Birth Mom -special space for birth moms from across the country to share their unique perspective. This is not intended to feature specific adoption stories, but rather a place to gain insight into the world of what it's like to be a birth mom. 

Meet Michelle - our very first contributor! Before hearing more from her, we thought you might like to get acquainted and learn a little bit more about her story! 


 

Book Club

We're kicking off our very own BraveLove Book Club this summer, reading through some classic and not-so classic books about adoption. We want you to know what adoption books are good, practical, poignant, or just great page-turners. Here is our first book and a brief review of what we thought... Note: There are no spoilers in this book club!