Dear Birthmom,

I want to encourage you today about the decision you have made. Having made this choice I know some of the feelings you may be experiencing. It is an exquisite pain.

Happy Mother’s day today and every day. It is a true honor to share today’s celebration with you. There is no other woman on Earth I will ever share this connection and bond and title to our son with and with that comes a love and respect that I will never truly be able to convey.

For my birth son,

A decision so selfless, a love so pure.

You were a gift from the Lord and a blessing for her.

As the days pass by quickly and as the seasons they change,

Her bond for you will always remain.

Thank you for giving me a second chance at life. Thank you for being strong and giving me life. I gave joy to my adoptive parents who couldn't have a child, you made their dreams come true. Because of you, my adoptive mother got her dreams and you got a second chance. I write this as a daughter to two mother's whom I both have a special bond with strength of two powerful woman. My message to those looking to give up your child, I am a success story, as hard as it is to give up that small innocent baby or child, just know that bond will never be gone. My genes and blood live on with one, love and opportunities live with my other. Just remember we are all energy and I will one day be reunited in spirit to that brave woman who loved me enough to spare me her pain and gave me a chance. I love you both, my two moms. I hope I can meet her one day in person But I thank her from the bottom of my heart.

Alison

When I found out I was pregnant, my boyfriend and I considered marriage, raising the child together, but through the support and counsel of family and friends, came to the conclusion we should not get married just because I had gotten pregnant.  Such a sacred, covenantal relationship should be Plan A, not Plan B. With marriage out of the picture, my boyfriend and I really had to search our hearts for what we thought was going to be best for our son. I wanted to raise my son. Of course, I wanted to raise my son. To see him take his first steps, learn his first words, watch him grow into the man the Lord created him to be. I didn’t really care about the personal sacrifice it would take to be a single mom. I was willing to make it - a hundred times over. But the truth is that I also wanted something else.

In honor of Mother’s Day, here's a story told by one woman who has actually walked in the shoes of birth mothers and adoptive mothers.

When faced with the challenges of infertility, grief, loss and fear, she developed a deeper compassion, a greater hope, and a more open heart than she ever could have dreamed possible. Meet Jennifer.

My story, just like so many others, is hard to put into words. Hard to put on paper all of the moments, thoughts, hurts, fears and celebrations that have brought me to the spot I stand in today.

My heart was pounding as we pulled into the agency to meet her. A beautiful young woman who had chosen us to parent her child. She was due any day. A boy would be born and I would bring him home. I would be his mommy! My heart was overwhelmed with that thought. I was in love with him already, but was overwhelmed with fear that she would change her mind. What if she was like the last birth mother? What if she changed her mind? What if I prepared my heart and home again, only to have her choose to parent? But I was also overwhelmed with grief. Grief for this beautiful soul who would soon have to do the most painful thing imaginable- to hand over her child to another woman. I think all adoptive mothers hurt for their birth moms, but it's different for me. I don't just hurt for her, I grieve with her. I understand and feel her pain in a way that few can.

Over the last 19 years, my adoption journey has taken me on some seriously intense emotional ups and downs. If given the opportunity to go back and do it all again, I can think of a lot that I might change, but I realize that each and every experience taught me something unique. Without those experiences, I may not be where I am at today. Our life journeys allow us to grow as individuals; and when adoption becomes part of our journey we gain a perspective into life that few others will ever truly understand.

We haven’t yet met, but I pray for you and your little one every day. I hope you feel an overwhelming peacefulness as you travel down this path. This Valentine’s Day, I am sending you love. Know that you are not alone—I am thinking of you. You are a kind, self-sacrificing, courageous woman. You are a blessing to your little one and to me. I am grateful for you. I hope you have a wonderful day.

BraveLove is excited to share a series of four narratives during the months of October and November!

Taken from an article written by adoptive mom, Helen Harris, these four heartfelt narratives will captivate and challenge your perspective as they clarify how individual experience and relationships change over time. The authors include one adoptee, her birth mom and adoptive mom, and her sister. The relationships challenge the adoption stereotypes of good and bad, address the myths that surround reunion, and propose possibilities for children through adoption that values birth families.

Join us as we share these narratives in celebration of National Adoption month, and unfold the story of adoption through the lens of first the birth mother, the daughter she raised, the daughter she placed, and finally, the woman she chose to raise her daughter.

BraveLove is excited to share a series of four narratives during the months of October and November!

Taken from an article written by adoptive mom, Helen Harris, these four heartfelt narratives will captivate and challenge your perspective as they clarify how individual experience and relationships change over time. The authors include one adoptee, her birth mom and adoptive mom, and her sister. The relationships challenge the adoption stereotypes of good and bad, address the myths that surround reunion, and propose possibilities for children through adoption that values birth families.

Join us as we share these narratives in celebration of National Adoption month, and unfold the story of adoption through the lens of first the birth mother, the daughter she raised, the daughter she placed, and finally, the woman she chose to raise her daughter!